Dave is one of St Clare Hospice’s GriefLine volunteers, who help give grief a voice by offering his compassion and expert listening skills to support bereaved people via our free telephone support service. We spoke to Dave about his St Clare Hospice story and how his volunteer roles have evolved at the hospice over the years.
Q: What inspired you to start volunteering at St Clare Hospice and what keeps you coming back?
‘My father-in-law died peacefully at Farleigh Hospice in 2016 and following that experience I decided that as soon as I retired I would volunteer at a local charity. So I did. I started as a gardener, but making connections and seeing the good work that the charity provides, I was allowed to come indoors!
‘Regular communications from the Hospice tell me where they need extra help from volunteers. There are very few jobs for the Hospice that I would prefer not to do.’
Q: Can you share a memorable experience or moment from your time volunteering that really stuck with you?
‘I have enjoyed talking to patients, getting them cups of tea. Their life stories have stayed with me. Occasionally, holding the hand of a patient as they quietly and calmly died. Though that did not happen as often as you would assume. But I remember with fondness each of those occasions.
‘A gentleman with a fascinating military history was not being visited by friends nor family. We had friendly chats. His stories live on, via me. I was pleasantly surprised that an old warhorse like him wanted to hold another bloke’s hand as he relaxed.
‘A fundraising event would have had to be cancelled unless somebody could attend. I almost got frost bite, but I raised funds, maintained relationships and helped make an event memorable for attendees.
‘Hearing at a funeral how much my presence had meant to a patient who I had visited for over a year. I always knew that my visits were appreciated, but it was touching to have the Hospice acknowledged so publicly.’
Q: How do you feel your role as a volunteer contributes to the work and mission of St Clare Hospice?
‘In all the roles that I have undertaken, I have experimented with what I can ‘bring to the party’ and developed areas where my skills matched the needs of the Hospice. I do not mind that my attempt in the garden to weave invasive Vinca plants into furniture was not embraced by my colleagues! They were probably right.
‘When people call GriefLine, they often start the conversation by saying that they don’t know what to say. It is so nice that by the end of the call, they thank us for being so attentive, allowing them to express their feelings without our judging them. It feels like the person who ends the call is different to the person who called us. Often, callers are encouraged to take up our other services.’
Q: What have you gained personally from volunteering – skills, friendships, confidence or anything else?
‘To be honest, a feeling of self-satisfaction, of a job well done. And I intend carrying on.’
Q: What would you say to someone who is thinking about volunteering at St Clare Hospice but isn’t sure where to start?
‘Go for it! Ask not what the Hospice can do for you, but what you can do for the Hospice. Like me in the Hospice garden. Start enjoying that, but talk to people as you are doing it, tell people about you, and you might be surprised at what you are good at, without knowing it in advance. Then training will polish out the rough edges.’
Interested in volunteering?
If Dave’s story has inspired you to volunteer your talents and time with St Clare, register your interest in volunteering below.